Flashback Friday

After almost losing {all} of my digital pictures, I've had to go back through and reorganize things from the recovery.

When I click on 2010, one of the first sets of pictures that pop up are those last few weeks of {belly pictures}.

This time last year, I was very, very, very pregnant with the little girls.

There was very limited {sleep}.

Many {aches} and pains.

But without a shadow of a doubt, we knew we were incredibly {blessed} to be where we were...only days away from being 38 weeks.

Not much has changed. 

There are still sleepless {interrupted} nights, although much fewer and farther between.

My arms and back {ache} at the end of the day from carrying around over 40lbs between the two little girls, but I've certainly developed some arm muscles.

And we are still, without a shadow of a doubt, incredibly {blessed} to be exactly where we are.

But what has changed is this:

(that was almost 13 lbs of baby right there almost a year ago to the day...holy wow I was huge!)

And what joy and happiness this brings me to see these sweet {serious} little faces staring back at me!

(thank you Lori for this great picture you took for us at Thomas' party!)

Almost a year later.

Then again, maybe a {whole lot} really has changed!

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 

Psalm 139:13-14

In All Honesty...

...I've probably come across as looking at things a little too much through rose-colored glasses on this here blog.

My husband, mom, and closest friends know otherwise!

The truth be known: the end of any pregnancy is no fun. The end of a twin pregnancy is even less fun, especially when someone moves your cheese!

First of all here's one last belly pic that I'll post. It's gotten harder and harder for me to turn sideways to take them! I'll try to remember to take one early Tuesday morning right before the girls are born...if in fact they wait that long! :)

I had originally created this very honest list of not-so-fun aspects of being this pregnant with twins. But after much thought about this post...I just can't make my woes and complaints the main part of it! I will still include some of the realities we've faced at the bottom because they are just that, realities; but I have to create another list first.

I have linked into several blogs of families with multiples. I have read a lot of stories. I have read a lot about the risks associated with carrying twins. I have marveled at the complication-free pregnancy I have experienced against so many odds, even with emergency surgery at 10 weeks.

• We are at 37 weeks and 4 days. At 37 weeks, less than 2% of twins remain in the NICU. Twins are considered full term at 37 weeks. We have officially avoided premature birth.
• I've never been in pre-term labor. My contractions have never been consistent or painful. I've avoided magnesium and other drugs necessary to stop contractions as well as steroid shots to speed up the development of the girl's lungs (which come with complications themselves).
• My blood pressure has remained constant and good throughout (except for when my tube ruptured, but that had nothing to do with the twins!). No preeclampsia. No PIH (pregnancy induced hypertension). 
• I tested negative for gestational diabetes.
• The girls are in 2 separate sacks, decreasing (and I think completely ruling out) their risks for things like TTTS (twin to twin transfusion syndrome) or becoming entangled in each other's cords. 
• I have never been put on bed rest...just stay off your feet and rest.
• There have been no problems with the girl's placentas...no previa no abruption.
• And we clearly have not had any intrauterine growth restrictions (these girls are huge!).

I don't post any of this to brag. I have not one single solitary thing to brag about because every bit of this has been out of my control and in God's hands! My doctor even said it (weeks ago in an opposite way)...reminding me that if they came early that it was nothing I could prevent. Therefore, there is nothing that I have done or could have done to keep them where they are this long either, but I am still so thankful!!!! I can't explain why some women experience these complications and others do not. The only thing I know is that we have been incredibly blessed: blessed to avoid these complications, blessed that the twins were not harmed during my surgery as far as we know, and blessed to be alive! 

I am blessed beyond words to have the opportunity to be uncomfortable, to ache, to deal with indigestion/heartburn for this long and to still be carrying these girls! But I'm committed to not sugar coat things on here. It's not been all easy and perfect. It has been really hard at times! Here are just a few of the cold, hard realities of the last few weeks of being pregnant with (not small) twin girls:

• I can just be sitting and get terribly dizzy.
• I often times can't lay down because of severe reflux but can't sleep sitting up. If I lean back too far, someone inevitably sits on my interior vena cava, causing my brain to think my blood pressure is low thus immediately trying to make it jump higher resulting in red hot ears and a crazy blood pressure! (this also happens sometimes when I have a contraction)
• The middle of my right back hurts almost all the time. I'm carrying 75% of the babies on the right side (Baby A's head/torso and Baby B's torso/legs). It's hit a new level this week.
• Baby B loves to dig herself into my right bottom rib. 
• Baby A's bottom continues to reside in my pelvis, causing me to take even more frequent trips to the potty. 
• Someone is also sitting on a nerve that runs down my entire leg. It gets old really quickly when your entire leg just aches!
• My hips feel like they are one step away from dislocating. I've quit walking around with anything but tennis shoes on!
• Water causes indigestion/reflux. How weird is that! So does peanut butter and peanut m&m's! Sad!
• I am down to maybe 3 shirts that actually fit me. I am borrowing 4 people's maternity clothes too! None of my tank tops fit me. They gradually ride up until they sit right above my belly, basically defeating the purpose of wearing them! I much prefer athletic pants over any other pants. I'm tired of those 3 shirts.
• My arms are almost not long enough to allow me to do things without rubbing my belly up against something: washing my hands, getting clothes out of the washer, reaching over the stove. Annoying because I hate it when my belly rubs up against things. It hurts where my scar is!
• Everyone wants to touch my belly now because it is so big; and while it used to not bother me when my closest friends would (in fact, I loved grabbing their hands to feel one of the girls kick), now I literally back away from people or put my hand up. My belly hurts because it's stretching so much daily...on top of stretching a still healing incision!  
• The other half of the people I run across who don't want to touch my belly, stare at it with a scowl on their faces. Maybe it's just an intense glare. Who knows, but my mom even noticed it the other day! It's funny to watch them stare and then have them realize I'm watching them! I just smile when their eyes finally pull away from my belly! ;)
• My right ring finger is so swollen that I had to pry my ring off using soap for fear that it would have to be cut off later! It makes no sense why only one finger is swollen...but at least it's not my whole hand or whole body!
• My scar has grown from 7 inches to well over 10 inches. Parts of it burns when its touched and other parts of it are numb. 
• And although most common in the 2nd trimester, I have severe ligament pains that sent us to L & D Sunday night to be monitored. When I told the on-call OB the sizes of the girls at the last ultrasound, he said he was shocked I hadn't been in earlier! 

...and those are a few of the realities of the last few weeks of being pregnant with twin girls!

Please join us as we continue to pray for a complication-free birth of our girls. Sure, I don't want to have surgery again. I vividly remember waking up from the other surgery in so much pain that all I could do was point at my stomach. But I had lost almost a liter of blood and been given 4 units of donated blood. My body had been in shock for hours. My blood pressure had been so low that my muscles ached from shivering. And this time it's planned. It's more controlled. It's a smaller incision. My body might be a little on the tired side, but nothing compared to the last time I had surgery. So I'm holding onto that. Sure. It's not going to be fun, but we will have two little blessings to hold soon!

...and I'm absolutely beyond words excited about that!!!

Psalm 29:11
The Lord gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace.

The Most Random Post Ever...Maybe

Our internet has been down for about 24 hours.  I've felt totally disconnected from the world! Maybe because I had time yesterday during Addie's nap to post some pictures and couldn't. Who knows...but there's no excuse! :)

Last week, Addie ended up with her first yucky throw-up stomach bug. Yuck and not fun! She slept and cuddled and slept and cuddled all day Monday and Tuesday. As much as I didn't want her sick, it was such a sweet time with her! I was so thankful we could do just that...cuddle and sleep!

oh...and watch videos! (way blurry...sorry). She loved cuddling with her giraffe from Kat Kat!

This past weekend was crazy. I got told to "rest and stay off my feet" two days before such a fun weekend. My mom really wanted me to just cut something out, but instead, Paul came with us to both birthday parties and chased Addie the whole time! Is he a great or what?

There was a Mother's of Multiples sale here in Montgomery Saturday morning. I hate to say it, but it didn't touch the one in Birmingham. That's ok. I found 2 cute outfits! :)

Then we had Anna Beth's birthday party in Wetumpka at the Sonshine Park. It was a gorgeous day!  

This is a huge playground, and Paul literally followed her around the whole time so I could get a few pictures and then go sit down!

Anna Beth (birthday girl) and Addie swinging! Their birthdays are only a few days apart!

And look at this darling cake! Anna Beth's mommy took a picture to Publix, and this is what they made! Adorable!

While Addie and Paul stayed at Anna Beth's party, I ran drove down the road to Rena's shower. Our 40 weeks due dates are only a week apart, but she'll have a scheduled c-section and who knows when the twins will show up.  No matter what, our girls will be about a month or less apart! And Addie and Rena's son Jace are about 6 weeks apart!

Here are the 3 expectant mother's at the shower: me (2 days shy of 33 weeks*), Rena (32 weeks) , and Rena's friend (who will deliver next week!).


Then on Sunday we had Lucas' 2nd birthday party! It was another gorgeous day, even though rain was predicted! We played outside the whole time! I forgot my camera, but Anna took these for us!

Addie had a blast on this powered 4 wheeler (in her smocked dress)!

She was so excited that Lucas had so many balls to play with!

Then there was church on Sunday and life group at our house Sunday night. Neal and Jennifer surprised us with a shower and this gorgeous cake! Jennifer is an amazing cake decorator! Check out that bow!

Addie was so sweet with baby Toni, Neal and Jennifer's little foster baby. She loved giving Toni her paci (and taking it back)!

(This was even after our church had a huge baby shower for us last Sunday! I left my memory card at home and couldnt take any pictures...but I figured I'd mention it! We got some wonderful gifts and so many diapers and wipes! Praise God!)

What a fun weekend! I'm so thankful for my sweet husband! He was such a trooper, never complaining once about all the places we went and all the time he had to spend chasing Addie. Usually we do it together, but he was on his own! He's been fabulous at home, even after working all day, cooking dinner and doing dishes. I am so thankful he's so committed to our family and to Addie.

*Now, if you made it to the end of this post, you're a dedicated reader! I intended to take a 32 week belly picture but never did. So here I am 33 weeks + 2 days. What's amazing to me is the difference in how high I was carrying the girls at 32 weeks 5 days (see picture from Rena's shower) vs 33 weeks 2 days! I stood up Monday night and all Paul could say was, "Whoa! Look at how low you are!" Then Addie's teachers said the same thing when I took her to school Tuesday! I could definitely tell because I can finally BREATHE! So I'm anxious to see what the doctor says today at my appointment today!!!

one. two. THREE!

Addie has a music (still known around here as meeky) CD with Ring Around the Rosy (known as Ashes Ashes by her) on it.  After singing the song, a voice on the CD says: Ring around you. Ring around me. Everybody jumps up when I count to three. One, two... and Addie always yells THREEEEEE!

That's how I feel right now...like yelling the number THREE.  

Three people. THREE!

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With every step we take in preparation for these little ones arrival, it becomes more of a reality to me.

Bedding...for two.

Cribs...for two.

Car seats...for two.

Matchy matchy outfits or coordinating outfits...for THREE!

Lord willing, we will bring home two healthy infants.  Addie will have two little sisters. There will be two itty bitty tiny babies to love and nurture and cherish. Our family will go from having one child to THREE...

As much of a worrier as I've always been and as easy as I could become overwhelmed, God has granted us this amazing peace throughout this pregnancy...even over the bumps and hills and mountains we've faced and crossed. It's not something that words can explain, you know, because it's that peace that surpasses all understanding!  

Yesterday was a huge benchmark for this pregnancy: 28 weeks. I've been eying this date on my calendar, longing for it in fact. Twenty-four weeks was the first goal. And these last 4 weeks have flown by.  Before we know it, we'll be 32 weeks and then, hopefully, 36 weeks. Part of me wants to push the pause button and the other part of me wants to hit fast forward! Thankfully, I can do neither!

So I'm trying to cherish these moments when my back doesn't hurt and I can actually take a deep breath, when I don't feel like a baby is going to pop out at any moment due to the pressure, and when I have even an ounce of energy.

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I watched Addie as we walked into music class yesterday. This baby isn't even a toddler now...she's a little girl. She loves to snuggle. She just sits in my lap or next to me sometimes for way longer than any almost 2 year old sits still. She tells me she loves me without me even telling her first. She tells me what she's done at MMO and who she's played with. She loves her friends and loves to be outside. She reads her books by finishing the sentences we're reading to her. She sleeps in a big girl bed and goes to sleep on her own! She talks about wanting the babies to be born right now so she can hold them. She calls them by name and calls them her sisters.

(oh...and a side note: she can scream louder and with a higher pitch than any human being i know. She often chooses to do this at the most inopportune times, like when I'm checking out in a store and can't do a thing to stop her. She hates leaving anywhere she's having fun and doesn't hesitate to express that. She can turn into a wailing rag doll heaped on the floor in seconds. She's deliberately testing limits right and left. She can cut her eyes at me like a 13 year old who's about to roll them. She's, without a doubt, a strong willed child. )

And I love every stinking ounce of her! 

When I picked her up from Mother's Morning Out today, she was walking around the room loving on a baby doll.  We are praying this transfers and minimizes her transition to having two baby sisters!

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Well...since I'm feeling good and wearing black, I took a quick 28 week 1 day belly shot. I'm not posting it here, but you can click here to see it.  I'm just not big on belly shots/maternity pictures. I don't know why. I don't mind snapshots of me with others or something like that, just nothing formal and focused on my belly! I love looking at them of other people, but I just don't really think I want them taken (or really just published) of myself. Just me. :) But I have a few friends who I can't see in person who keep begging for one...so there you have it!

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I'm off to finish planning Addieboos 2 year old birthday party. I'm frantically trying to get a top smocked for her because I refuse to let that kind of thing go just because I'm pregnant! You know...all the while I'm sitting on the bed with my feet propped up resting...

Thankful...indescribably thankful!

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:7