"Not Me!" Monday

Alrighty. I was not planning to do a "Not Me!" Monday until I read that Kelly had actually been brought to tears of laughter by previous posts and inspired to do her own!

Kelly's are far funnier than anything I did not do this week, but hey, here they are!

We did not receive an email from Paul's mom who'd received an email from Amazon.com that the coffee maker she'd given Paul a few years back had been recalled. This recall was not due to the possibility of the boiler exploding. We have never (really, we havent) had anything we owned be recalled! I did not just laugh and shake my head only wishing that our AC/furnace, refrigerator, kitchen faucet, bedroom TV, and main sewer line could have only been recalled instead of just plain flat out broken so we would not {really} have had to fund their replacements!

Oh...and did I mention that Paul did not have to replace the inside of our guest bathroom toilet because it was {really} not sealing thus causing the water to constantly run. We did not go from using 2-4 thousand gallons of water a month to 10-11 thousand gallons of water a month because of this. I mean, we hope it is because of this, because if it isn't, we're in trouble somewhere else in our house!!!

I was not totally baffled as to why Addie's hair was sticking to her head Sunday morning after she'd had a bath. I did not try to unstick it by ruffling it with my hand only to have it turn into a bunch of frizz (I mean, I should know by now what curly hair does, right?). As I was feeding her, I did not realize that, although with good intentions, I had put shampoo in Addie's hair to wash it (and get out any reminiscent of food from the night before), but had not, however, remembered to rinse it out. I'd never forget do a thing like that!

Addie's shoes did not promptly break, flower and button falling off, the very 1st time she'd ever worn them!

I am not doing an obedience class with Abbey, again, because I felt sorry for her after we lost Molly. Every other dog in the class has not {has i mean} already taken this class, failed it, and is retaking it again. She has not {really she has} been a complete angel, well behaved and totally obedient the whole time, acting like she didnt even need this class...until tonight! Until everyone was praising their very well behaved dog as they sat obediently beside them. Until my dog started freaking out, got up, raced across the room at full speed, slipping and sliding all over the concrete, totally not embarrassing me as everyone looked on {in horror}. Ok, not in horror, but it sure felt like it. And I did not have to refrain from laughing the entire rest of the class because she looked so silly running 90 miles an hour and only going 10! ...guess you had to be there! ;)

And saving the best for last...I did not ask Paul to change Addie's diaper before church. I always do that, you know. I did however actually dress her:

dress? check.

diaper? already put on by Daddy. check.

diaper cover? too small

diaper cover #2? will do

socks? check...but oh I wish I knew where that other one with the ruffles was that was lying on her changing table earlier.

shoes? check

bow? will do without

bib for the car so that everything she's consumed since 5am doesn't end up on her dress? check

Ready for church. Ha! Right?

Well, I was certainly not called back to the nursery when church was over to be told what I had done (as all 3 nursery worker in the front snickered under their breath...really!). I was not totally embarrassed and running over in my head: did I forget something? does she have on 2 different socks? she was dressed, right?

Only to be told that when they changed her diaper, they did not find this in it:

WHAT is that, you ask? Oh, that's not the sock that I was looking for early. But it is! There's no way that would end up in her diaper. Right? Hmmmm....I guess I'd better make sure I change the diaper right before we head out to Sunday School next week so nothing else manages to make it's way into it!

Now...what have you not done this week?!?!?

Thanks for the inspiration Kelly! Happy {at the very end of the day} Monday!!!