"Not me!" Monday

Whoohoo! The official "Not Me!" Monday is back! Make sure to check out MckMama's blog and see her new pictures of her beautiful kiddos!

What a week! Here goes:

I did not leave the water running into the frying pan the whole time I ate breakfast. It did not occur to me that there was the sound of running water coming from the kitchen. Our water bill has not been higher than ever before over the past few months, and I should not have been conserving water. I did not wonder why I have not repossessed my brain after an entire year of not being pregnant! I do not still have pregnancy brain even though I am truly not {i'm really not} pregnant! I'd never do something that wasteful and absent minded!

Addie did not follow me into the bathroom and grab a cup off the sink because she is not tall enough to do that! We were not all dressed and ready to walk out the door for Bible Study. She did not then proceed to play in the water that was in the above said cup. I could not do anything about this because I was on the potty! I do not always have my child following me into the bathroom so I do not ever potty alone anymore, and I certainly do not talk about things like this on my blog!

I did not knock a whole cup of milk on floor. I did not really want to cry over spilled milk because it was Addie's organic whole milk that costs twice as much as ours!

I did not decide at the last minute to take my car for a tune-up after I dropped Addie off for Mother's Morning Out. I am way more of a planner than that, and I had way more to do besides that! I did not decide to let their courtesy van bring me home so I could start packing for the beach. As I shut the van door and watched him drive away down my street, I did not realize that I had left my house keys in my car at the dealership. I did not then proceed to break into my own house and promptly set off the alarm, only to still be locked out of the house unable to turn the alarm off! I did not have to make Paul borrow a friends car and bring me his keys all the while listening to my alarm go off and standing helplessly on my front porch! And if you're wondering, no, the cops did not {they really didn't) show up because I did have my cell phone and was able to tell the alarm company that it was a false alarm. Well...sort of, given the fact that someone was actually trying to break into my house...it was just me!

After being picked back up and returned to the dealership, I did not get in my car only to attempt to crank it and realize that it had a dead battery. It was not 11:23am, and I was not supposed to pick up Addie by 11:30am (or get charged a late fee by the minute!). My car did actually crank, and they did not {they really didnt} charge me a late fee for being late! I'd never have such ridiculous luck, I mean, if I believed in luck and all!

I did not take Addie to the doctor to make sure that she did not have an ear infection, strep, or swine flu because she was so ridiculously mean and cranky! I did not tell the nurse that there had better be something wrong with her or else because she'd been so cranky! Her ears were actually clear, her throat was not red, and she certainly didn't have any symptoms of swine flu. However, after peering into her mouth, the doctor did not inform me that she was cutting not one, not two, but FOUR molars! Well...I think I'd be cranky too...I mean I would not be!

I did not have to leave a restaurant at the beach because Addie was straining to do a diaper. She was not straining so hard that she was quickly becoming a screaming, red faced, angry baby! We did not have to go by a drugstore and pick up baby laxative drops to help my baby girl out! She did not wake up 4 or 5 times that night for whatever reason. And she did not decide that the middle of the night was the best time to explode. I would never discuss this type of thing on my blog either...never!

Now...what did you not do this week! Make sure to leave a comment and share!

Happy Monday!