"Not Me!" Monday

If you read my blog post yesterday, then I know you've been waiting with baited breath to find out the reason behind our altered Christmas carol. So...

Our 8 foot Christmas tree did not fall over. No way. I certainly had not just filled the entire base to the brim with water (so I'd have to water it less frequently). I had not finished putting lights on it the night before and finally gotten it decorated with ornaments (with Addie's assistance of course). One measly ornament couldn't have been the culprit to such a disaster. No way. Putting all the ornaments on 2/3rds of the tree certainly couldn't have been the culprit either. How would less than 60 ornaments on a huge tree cause it to topple over onto the chair and come crashing down right next to where I was standing in front of Addie? Two very old ornaments did not break. Certainly not. I mean, I wouldn't have old ornaments unless I was in fact old...right? I was not home alone either, having no idea 1) how I was going to stand it back up and 2) what I was going to do with it after that. Nope...not me!

My mom and I did not realize that Addie's 12 month pjs were too small...when she's only 8 and a half months old. I did not pull out 3 pairs of 18 month pjs from the bottom drawer only to have my mom sweetly (and that is the truth) ask if that was all I had. I mean...I have an 8 month old. What mother would need more than 3 (even 3) pairs of 18 month old pjs for her 8 month old? I'd never buy pjs to fit a child 10 months older than mine 12 months in advance only to have them fit 2 months later. Nope...not me!

Our dog Mollie did not find the grocery bags I dropped on the floor as I walked in because Addie was screaming at the top of her lungs. It did not contain 2 lbs of organic beef and 1 lb of organic chicken. I'd never leave anything like that on the floor! She certainly didn't rip open one of the beef containers and start eating the raw meat. That would be disgusting and a total waste of money! And there's no way that I wrapped the remainder back up in the bag and browned it to go in our taco soup later that night. She hasn't been scrounging for food in the kitchen, surfing counters, or taking food right out of my hands since then either. Nope...

Finally, I did not pull my 14 year old diabetic cat's tooth. I had not avoided taking her to the vet because we still owe them several hundred dollars from Mollie being sick. I did not just let the tooth hang out of her mouth for several weeks because I knew all the vet would do is pull it without anesthesia again and charge us $100 for it. I also did not start her on antibiotics. I'd never have cat antibiotics just lying around the house put up on a shelf with our pet supplies! We always finish the medication the vets give us for our animals...always! We'd never take our pet's care into our own hands. Nope, not us!

I hate it that I wasn't able to get a picture of our toppled tree, but I was a little more concerned about the almost 2 gallons of water pouring onto the floor. :) Not to worry...we got everything straightened back up minus the tree skirt.

So what have you not done this week?!?!? Do share! You know it's great therapy...and it's free!

Make sure to check out MckMama's blog for a good laugh! Happy Monday!